The Best (and Worst) Movies of 1994

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The Best (and Worst) Movies of 1994

Postby Kaing of Kaings » November 13th, 2016, 2:34 pm

1994 was a surprisingly strong year for movies. I have 7 movies with 5 star ratings (marked with an *) and there were surprisingly few 2 star movies with no 1 star movies. Usually there are some really bad stinkers in there. It could of just been that I didn't see as many movies that year as I wasn't able to drive a car yet and the UBSTU gang hadn't formed yet. Anyway, here is the list.

The Best of 1994
1. The Shawshank Redemption* - (The Shankshaw Exemption)
1. (Tie) True Lies* - (Batteries Asisss....Get another one you Moron)
2. Dumb and Dumber* - (Just when I think you couldn't be any more dumber, you do something like this...And Totally Redeem yourself)
2. (Tie) Forrest Gump* - (So you just RAAAAAN)
3. The River Wild* - (It all started when David Strathairn was eating at the Dairy Queen in Thermopolis Wyoming and Kevin Bacon walked in...)
4. The Lion King* - (The Lion Kaing of Kaings)
5. The Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult* - (Aaaa eeeee....wahooooo)
6. Speed - (I'm smarter than you. I'm so much smarter than your....ueeaaahhh....shing.....Well I'm Taller)
7. Ace Ventura - Pet Detective - (Finkle is Einhorn, Einhorn is Finkle)
8. Iron Will - (Iron Will...why are you running in slow motion at the finish line with your feet flying up in the air?)
9. Pulp Fiction - (Royall with Cheese)
10. City Slickers 2 -(The Return of Mitchy the Kid and the Legend of Curly's short and curlies)

The End of Art Malik as we know it.

Best TV:
1. Peter Gabriel-Secret World*
2. American Experience - FDR

The Worst of 1994
1. Star Trek: Generations - (Star Trek-The Quest for Spock's Balls)
2. The Crow - (The Gothic Bore. Remember Goth? yea glad that phase is dead)
3. Ed Wood - (A shitty movie about a shitty director)
4. Wyatt Earp - (Can't compete with Tombstone)
5. In the Army Now - (Designated spot for "Worst Pauly Shore Movie of the Year" award)
6. The Client - (Tommy Lee Jones investigates a Stuboy who beats Mantha's for a living and can't defend him in court even though it's his civic duty)
7. Beverly Hills Cop III - (Eddie Murphy goes to Six Flags-Magic Mountain to catch some roller coaster tycoon riding thieves)
Harry: " Whoa, Jesus, Check out the butt on that one."

Lloyd: "He must work out."

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