Presenting (fake and real) news you could care less about but are still curious to read. The majority of these are outdated but funny to read. They are pretty irrelevant now. The MiloFM news concerns our station.

As of 3-19-09

MILOFM Inside Report
Millcreek, Utah


We are back after a nasty computer virus knocked out the main computer that handles the audio and such for the station. We were off air for at least four days, but we're back on. Please pardon our scheduling mess as the virus completely deleted all files we had. Don't worry, the music is fine. We'll also still run C2C, and Between the Lines on their normal schedule. The 80s show will be temporary on hold until we can fix the schedule up.

Also, give us a few more days to get back to normal operating status. The antenna system is fine, the transmitter is fine, the computer is missing some programs. The frontpage of the station has been updated to reflect the fact that we're back! Give us a listen.

MILOFM Inside Report
Millcreek, Utah

MILOFM Status updates for you. What have we been up to and more!

MILOFM is still operating and as of a few days ago, we're now covering the east better. Just today I tested the station out up in the parking lot of Home Depot on 3300 south and could hear it. The coverage map may be revised soon, I don't know. We lost Randi Rhodes a few weeks ago when Nova M Radio, her network, mysteriously dropped her from their lineup and replaced her with Nancy Skinner. Thinking this would be temporary, (I thought she was sick) I aired the Nancy Skinner program up until last week. I really wish she would return to the airwaves, as we would be delighted to air her program again. As far as Mike Malloy ever coming back to our line up, given all the crap that is happening with his networks, the chances of this aren't likely. Plus this means the Retro show runs its proper time allotment now, without an hour missing. We added some new music and the playlist file on the main page will be updated to reflect the new stuff. We also pledge that all of our music is hand picked and not shoved down our throats like you'd see at a normal corporate radio station.

With Spring and Summer approaching, the chances of hearing MILOFM become greater and greater as the temperature rises. This is due to a phenomenon known as tropospheric ducting. This and, with upcoming temperature swings, will produce some neat effects that just might make our coverage area extend much farther than it is now.

As I was mentioning before, I upgraded several elements of the antenna system in order to provide a more stable signal in our frindge areas to the west and north. The north (and especially east) seemed to get better but thanks to many houses in the way, the west is still poor and the coverage map on the main page is pretty accurate. South is spotty and similar to what it was before.

To those of you who are either fans or who stumbled upon us by accident, we sincerely hope you enjoy the station and we'll continuing broadcasting commercial free goodness until our heads fall off.

I'm considering adding a donate button to the home page because this station is experiencing some of the same effects of other major radio stations due to the poor economy. Running this station costs money, mostly an electric and internet bill, and any help would be greatly appreciated. My electricity bill comes to around 70 dollars a month already. Can you believe that we only put out 20mW of power and the bill is that much? I can.

Again, thank you thank you thank you to all of our fans and listeners. We hope you like your neighborhood radio, since in all reality, other stations suck. We're commercial free all the way, we offer programs nobody else does, and we have about 10 gb worth of music listening pleasure playing every day. So long for now.

Salt Lake City Tristune
Salt Lake City, Utah

University of Utah's Freshman Seen as Very Imature

School started yesterday at the U, and already, complaints about noise levels in the dorms on campus have come rushing in. The complaints primarily originated from Sage Point, a dorm complex located on the far northeast side of campus. Sage Point is where incoming freshman are sent if there are not enough rooms in the Gateway Heights complex, located to the north of  Sage Point. "We have been getting several complaints per day about the noise," says Michael Pinder, resident director at the U. "Most of the complaints are of freshman playing music too loud or shouting obscenities," he added. Sage Point and the surrounding dorms were constructed in the early 2000s and were used extensively during the 2002 Winter Olympics. Senior Dwight Stubers, who is majoring in Human Consumption says "the freshman get worse and worse each year. They come in with the mentality that they are still in high school and that they can get away with anything they want," he commented. "Just wait till next semester, hopefully reality will have kicked in by then," he later added. Resident Director Michael Pinder stated that the noise problem will be addressed, particularly in Sage Point and Gateway, and he added that written warnings and possible expulsion from the resident halls is possible for continued noise violations. The point is, no matter how old it makes me look, turn your music down or else there will be hell to pay.

-Staff Writer Stu Lee Peters.

Rooters (OP-ED)
Green River, Wyoming

Construction Around City Very Sluggish.

You are driving into town and trying to get to somewhere on the south side. What do you see? Construction everywhere. The under pass near Railroad Avenue has been closed for a month and already has caused numerous traffic jams downtown and at the intersection of Uinta and Flaming Gorge Avenue. One particularly odd aspect of this project is how long it will take before the bridge can be open. Sure it will be open during the RiverFest later this month, but it will then close for another three months. Why does it take three months to renovate an underpass? Are the construction crews that the city hires lazy, do they have their thumbs up their butts for 90% of the day? It sure seems like it. Take a look at the apartment complexes going up across from the recreation center. Am I the only one who thinks that they are simply moving dirt back and forth every day? Is this what we want everyone who comes to town to see? Construction crews who can't manage to build a single building in three months. How come the housing contractors in the new subdivision near the high school can build a house in 2 weeks? What motivation must it take for the rest of the city to complete projects in a timely manner. Do we have a lack of employees or too many? Have we spread ourselves thin; I think very much so. The city of Green River likes to believe its a massive community with so many opportunities that one would think we're Salt Lake City for pete sake. Reality check, this sure as heck aint Salt Lake. If it was, we'd see improvements everywhere, as well as better roads, (esp. in Winter) cops that actually have better things to do than pull the same people over, over and over again. We are not Salt Lake City. We are not a bustling community that actually has enough people to give a hoot. We are Green River! Its time that the city got a kick in the crotch and realized that we can't imitate a city with well over a million people.
Pat Soguay
Green River, WY

APoo Wire
Rock Springs, Wyoming

Local Cemetery Caretaker has Affair with 'Lawnmower.'

The local cemetery caretaker for the Rock Springs Public Cemetery has apparently had an affair, with all things, a lawnmower. The incident happened yesterday when employees at the city, known as seasonals, confronted their supervisor when he had told them to "go somewhere else" as he closed the door to the shed where the crew keeps lawnmowers and other tools to maintain the cemetery. After hearing some strange noises, the seasonals investigated and found the caretaker apparently hugging and kissing the mower. The mower in question is a Walker model, but further information has not been released to the public. When captured committing the strange crime, the caretaker told his seasonals that they could no longer use the mower, as it was special and that anyone who rode it would be written up for damaging critical parts. The seasonals contacted the parks department supervisor who investigated the incident and found nothing was out of the ordinary. He also later informed the seasonals that lawnmower abuse was a "fire-able" offense at the city. Police are still investigating to see if the supervisor was really just being rude, or following protocol. No firings occurred at the time of writing.
Staff Writer
Doug Handley

APoo Wire
Green River, Wyoming

New boardwalk causes bad tempers, disgruntled employees.

As if construction on the boardwalk couldn't be slower, bad tempers and overall whiney-ness have slowed progress further, as have lashes of anger and frustration over seemingly stupid reasons. Reports are that seasonals, employees that only work during the summer for the various departments of the city, were being treated unfairly and that there was no excuse for the tempers of the so-called full time employees. This was only occurring for the parks department as they are the only city department replacing the boardwalk. Construction particularly slowed last week during the removal process when a full time employee who will not be named lashed out at a seasonal for no apparent reason. The full timer, which has been informed of his bad attitude and crustyness in prior incidents, was not investigated for the incident, and corruption within the system seems very much apparent.
Staff Writer
Hal Itosis