The Best (and Worst) Movies and TV of 2019

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The Best (and Worst) Movies and TV of 2019

Postby Kaing of Kaings » January 2nd, 2020, 5:04 pm

Well lets call 2019 a wrap for now. And let us remember 2019 as the last year where we may be able to see movies in the theater...possibly ever. Ok that might be hyperbolic but with COVID raging in 2020 and a DOTARD still in office (fingers crossed in 2 weeks that Biden/Harris will kick ass!) we are in some serious shit in 2020. 2020 is a turd of a year. That's why we must celebrate the year that was 2019. And starting off, my favorite picture of the year was Once Upon a Time in Hollywood which is Quentin Tarantino's tribute to old timey (1960s) Hollywood. It's a movie that has to be lived in for awhile to get used to but it grows on you no doubt. Also, the almost instant classic Klaus came out in 2019. It's a rare moment when you are watching a movie and tears of joy just stream down your cheeks the first time you see it. The last movie like that was Coco which was my favorite movie of 2017. It is such a delightful romp and I can't wait to watch it this Boymas! Does this year follow the rule of 9s. It was strong but not as the past years like 1989 and 1999. There were some other stronger years this last decade than 2019.

Docs were pretty strong but this year in TV was actually pretty damn good. Chernobyl blew me away with how good it was and how intense. Yellowstone just keeps getting better and a late breaker sneaker hit was kicked in my face by Cobra Kai, one of the funnest to watch shows I have seen in years. Shameless also made a rebound by losing Fiona and focusing on Lip, Ian, Debbie and my favorites, Mickey and Kevin. We also said goodbye to Game of Weiners for good. Most super fans were pissed with the ending but I thought it was ok. Still a good show over all. Also shout out to the stinkers. Not many this year because I don't watch ever movie that ever came out like I used to. Here is the breakdown.

Best movies of 2019!

1. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood - (Didn't know what to think the first time I saw it but started to really like it the second time.)
2. Klaus - (Almost an instant Boymas classic)
2. (Tie) Rocketman - (Benny and the Jetzzzzz)
3. Ford vs Ferrari - (Zoom Zoom Zoom Mattt Daaamon)
4. Toy Story 4 - (Woody gets a woody with Bo Peep)
5. Little Women - (Little Hea)(Plus it has my movie girlfriend (Florence Pugh)
5. (Tie) Avengers - (End Ballwarz)
5. (Tie) Stu Wars Epichode 9 - The Rise of Skyballer
6. The Peanut Butter Falcon - (Laboof goes full Laboof)
6. (Tie) 1917 - (Who’s doing the shoot’n WW1 style)
7. El Camino - (Jesse, we are going to S K U L L...Alaska!)
7. My Name is Dolomite - (Eddie Murphy is back)
7. Jojo Rabbit- (It’s time to kick Hitler in the balls once and for all)
8. The Irishman - (Don't dance with the DiNiro buck naked on a full moon night)
8. (Tie) Midway- (Woody Harrelson’s white wig wins WWII)
9. A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood - (Say little boy...Do you want to be my Neighbor?)
10. Escape Room - (Don't get shinged)
10. (Tie) The Dirt - (Girls Girls Girls..)
10. (Tie) Parasite - (What happens when Hessian South Koreans pretend to be rich?)
11. The Aeronauts - (The Ahguynauts)
11. (Tie) Crawl - (Barry Pepper and his hot Daughter sniper some gators)
12. Fighting with the Family - (Farting with my Family...a true story) (Plus it has my movie girlfriend Florence Pugh)
13. Marriage Story - (Divorce Sucks Balls)
14. Honey Boy - (Lebouf plays his abusive father and goes full Lebouf)

Runner ups: Bombshell, Dark Waters, Joker, Triple Frontier, The Highway Men, Shazam!, Dr. Sleep, Racing in the Rain, Uncut Gems, Arctic, Spiderman: Far from Home, Captain Marvel, Aladdin

Image

DiCaprio let's one rip on the dance floor.

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In Klaus, Santa is actual a giant beatforce robot sent back in time to punish the post office!

Best Docs of 2019:

1. Behind the Curve - (Flat Earthers fail at Science)
1. (Tie) Fyre, The Greatest Party that Never Happened.
2. American Factory
2. (Tie) Super Size Me 2 - Holy Chicken
2. (Tie) The Ted Bundy Tapes
3. Don’t Fuck with Cats
3. (Tie) David Crosby - Remember my Name
3. (Tie) We Believe in Dinosaurs
4. The Biggest Little Farm
5. Memory: The Origins of Alien
6. Apollo 11
7. Hail Satan
8. Leaving Neverland

Best TV of 2019 (Strong year so far)

1. Chernobyl - (God damn is this show intense)
1. (Tie) Yellowstone - Season 2 - (One of the wife and my favorite shows)
1. (Tie) Cobra Kai - Season 2 - (Johnny vs LaRusso, the Ultimate Ballwarz)
2. Stranger Things - Season 3 - (The series gets better)
2. (Tie) Succession -Season 2 - (The Roy’s family Ballwarz gets more intense)
2. (Tie) Shameless - Season 10 (The series still needs to end but improves with Fiona gone)
2. (Tie) Get Shorty - Season 3 (Damn good series but why only seven episodes?)
3. Mindhunter - Season 2 - (Strong season)
3. (Tie) Game of Thrones - Season 8 (The Show Comes to an end and some people got pissed owf. I wasn't one of them)
3. (Tie) The Affair - Season 5 (Time to say goodbye to some quality characters)
3. (Tie) Big Little Lies - Season 2 (time to say goodbye to another good show)
4. Sneaky Pete - Season 3 - (Pete gets Sneakier)
4. (Tie) The Mandalorian - Season 1 - (Stu warz is back)
5. You vs. Wild - (You can make Bear Grylls eat poop and almost die multiple times and it's actually kind of fun)
5.(Tie) Drain the Oceans - Season 2 (Big Ships haunt the deep)
6. South Park - Season 23 - (Tegrity)
6. (Tie) Family Guy - Season 19 (Some improvements)
7. The Crown - Season 3 (The Queen Queens house)
7. (Tie) True Detective - Season 3 - (Ali gets scary)
8. Movies that Made Us - Season 1
9. Love Death and Robots - (Love, Fart and Cartoon Oates)
10. Great Greek Myths - Season 2 (The Iliad)
11. Black Mirror - Season 5 - (Running out of ideas)


Worst of 2019

1. Long Shot - (Seth Rogen becomes grating and not funny but Charlize is still hot. How could she go for Rogen?)
2. Tolkien - (The true story of how J. R. Tolkien was inspired by WWI and Phil Collin's daughter to write the script for Peter Jackson's movie and still be bored by it all)
3. Dumbo - (Tim Burton is still stuck in directors jail)
4. Child's Play - (A made for TV movie with bad acting, dumb looking doll, and stupid plot points. The only thing saving this pile is over the top death scenes for some deserving characters)
5. Frozen 2 - (What a mess of a movie filled with boring songs and no nudity! Oh wait, this is Disney. Something was off with this one.)
6. 47 Meters Down: Uncaged - (Dorky Dad tries to save his daughter and dumb friends. They are trapped in an underwater cave trapped by sharks. He goes "Look girls...I can save you. I know a way out of this cave..just follow me...Swim down and....EEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH....Shing." Shark is like, Yum!)
Harry: " Whoa, Jesus, Check out the butt on that one."

Lloyd: "He must work out."

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